Sunday, November 16, 2014
I just moments ago finished reading 50 Shades of Grey.
I had bought it a year or so ago, meaning to read it because it was a cultural reference sort of book. Something you had to have read so you could make a few snarky comments about it at a party.
I got into it. I SO IDENTIFIED WITH HER in ways that taught me something about myself.
I'm not quite sure what it is, something on the order of could I give myself to another person beyond my limits?
Women my age don't have the social programing to be halfway submissive to men like my moms generation, or more fully like my grandma still is. Much less in the BDSM way.
Could I transcend my own upbringing and what I think of as my basic nature and personality to give more than I was...willing?...able?...prepared to deal with? For some one I loved so completely?
It is an interesting question, and one that drives the book.
I think I could do the Red Room of Pain scenes, if it were just scene. I don't know if I could do it with someone I loved. And I think that was her unanticipated limit.
50 Shades of Grey is the classic romance novel story arc, two people not terribly inclined to each other at first, then attraction and simultaneous repulsion, and then resolution. With a twist of the resolution at the end.
She's my age, my temperament, a bit introverted and introspective, clutzy and self demeaning, and totally dazzled by a man who would dazzle me!
Truth be told, I am not sure I wouldn't whore myself to him.
But then his intrigue with her is exactly in that she won't, and that she will be submissive willingly for love, but not for his less than sane urges. She is good for him, a path out of the darkness. She knows it. He doesn't. Interesting that she truly has the power as a submissive. Something I had never considered. And perhaps this is something that is in play in larger society, women, having power, in ways that are not so obvious.
Will she come back?
Well there are two more books! So its a given.
50 Shades was less than great literature in some ways, but the story, the characters, made up for it.
Now I join housewife's all over in day dreaming about a man who could make me want to submit.
Fetlife.com here I come.